Well staying at home today may well have been the best thing I’ve done for a while. Just becuase I’m feeling a lot better, not like spectacular, not even “good”, but I’m feeling better, having coaxed Java to work (actually not that hard!) and equally having got Forte 4 Java to crawl along at some unbearably slow pace….and I thought it was bad under windows – although it does say in the readme:
“The Linux JVM is more resource-intensive, so Linux users may want to have a higher memory configuration.”
Which, err, isn’t brilliant, because I quite like Forte, despite it’s “quirky” behaviour, which lead me to swearing at it quite often. It’s just convenient. Although once I sort out nedit on here, and since the jdk is now in the path (yes I’ve been productive. I just couldn’t lie there being depressed for some reason)…I may change my mind.
Anyway, yes. So that’s cheered me up somewhat, although the waiting for this person to get back to me from a recruitment firm is not cheering me up…esp since it means I can’t be online. I know it’s sad, but I fancy some company atm, and the only company I’m able to get is that of my friends online – going to work would just make me feel far worse. Still, only 3 days left….
Which reminds me….
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Okay, so I shouldn’t really use my diary to get rid of stuff, but I feel bad about throwing it away. Some people don’t even recognise the number so perhaps it’s an uncommon one….how should I know? It’s an Amstrad!
Oh, yes, I’m in the mood to comment on “Scary Movie” (Wow, Soap Opera, Free computer equipment, Diary and Movie reviews all in one….must be good!). Yes, so on sunday I went to see “Scary Movie”, now some of it would have been lost on me as I’ve never watched “Scream” – or indeed any of the Scream series of films….
But I know the idea behind them….and I’ve seen enough horror movies to get the majority of jokes. The problem I had with Scary Movie is that it felt like some fairly good set pieces linked by very, very flimsy links. There were good bits, not very good bits. But there were bits which made me laugh lots…unfortunately the word memorable does not spring to mind….(I can’t actually remember any of them!)
Some of the parodies of other films was quite good, particularly “The Usual Suspects”. But…well, it was underdeveloped as a film. It could have been so much better. It was also strongly american, which didn’t really help…. So overall? Well, 2 out of 5 I feel. It was watchable, but I wouldn’t watch it again….
Anyway, yes, so that’s that…
What else? Well, at the moment, becuase I’m feeling fairly miserable I’m getting tempted again. “Tempted?” you say. Yes. Tempted, tempted to go into london and spend money. Spend money on Music, Computers and maybe some decent clothes. All of which would be really, really bad. My car is in need of a service, I have no job and so would soon run out of money….but I really, really want to!
So. The other thing on my mind is fear. I know I can’t take 6 months of rejections from jobs, I know I can’t. It took me 6 months to get this job – and then I wasn’t appearing to be TS. Okay I was a mess mentally, but they didn’t know that – now I’m fixed mentally, but am TS. Wonderful.
If I don’t get a job in the near future I don’t quite know what I’m going to do – especially now they’ve removed my “run a small cinema” option. This was the Cinema in reading, on Friar Street, which they’re about to demolish in a heathen type act of vandalsim. This Cinema is a wonderful example of cinema architecture – and would make a fantastic small cinema, of the variety I’d quite fancy running – i.e. one which shows anime, sci-fi, art-house, etc. The films that aren’t so mainstream. And it’s right by a “suitable” bookshop….
But I don’t have the nerve, nor the money to do it. Why? well, the fear of it going bust and leaving me with no chance of SRS – because I’d need a loan for that and being declared bankrupt wouldn’t help with that. Also I have no idea how you run a cinema! To be honest I spend quite a lot of time persuading myself to not even try, which is sad, because they will demolish it, and it will be a terrible waste, and I will feel bad about not trying….
Anyway, I think I’ll logon, see if there’s any funky mail, and upload this….
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Kate
