Staples – Good service is in our history!

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Why’d it have to be so hard?!

Not that it’s very fair, my patience is really thin today; I was cursing myself for dropping a fork, but that’s what tiredness & hayfever & an essay to write does to me (about to get on with it, btw).

But I looked on the Staples Website, there was the printer I wanted. Woot I thought.

Off I went, cash (actual hard money cash) in hand, to Staples in Bristol city centre. Looked at the aisle of printers, couldn’t see the one I wanted. Head to Customer (dis)service desk – ask the General Manager “have you got this printer in stock”. Looks puzzled, checks website, states: “Ah, that’s one you can only get from the online store. See, this number here indicates it’s an online purchase only. We can’t even get that one…”


Wander round store with Trey, Nikki, Lauren, ‘meriKate. Oops, second row of printers. There’s the one I want. But none out on the shelves… Ask random store bloke – and yes, they’ve got one. They’ve got one, and it’s now mine. And there, there on the shelf is the Duplex unit for it too! Fuck yeah. Put them behind the till to wait for me to finish looking round.

Go and try to buy printer. Present mostly cash, but ‘cos I’m buying the duplexer too, I have to find an extra 11 quid – which I put on my debit card. So, Cash, Card and Store Loyalty Points card.

Takes money. Puts part payment in. Asks if I wanted to use the store card. Yes, obviously, that’s why I got it out…. Oh, can’t do that at this point in the transaction. Has to be done first. Take money off card. Refund money onto card….wait for manager to authorise refund….give back card. Ask if I want to pay on the card…. (well, no, you just refunded it onto that card so I could wear it as a frickin’ hat). Finally, get payment through, pick up stuff and walk out door….

…. alarm goes off….

GAH! Is it any wonder I like buying stuff online?!

But, it does rock. It does duplex, it’s kinda old-fashioned-black-computer-stylee. The quality of modern printers terrifies me, the plastic’s all flexy and gnarly. If you put too much paper in it just doesn’t feed it through (I have no idea what 150 sheets looks like). But it’s way nicer than my old 840c and it does duplex. Paper go in. Paper come out. Paper go in. Paper come out…. Woo :-) Funkatious.


Kate's a human mostly built out of spite and overcoming transphobia-racism-and-other-bullshit. Although increasingly right-wing bigots would say otherwise. So she's either a human or a lizard in disguise sent to destroy all of humanity. Either way, it's all good.