So I went out this morning and collected together the bits I need to fit the toilet; including some random new tools. I got cistern internals, I got an isolation valve, and lots of bits and bobs. 100 quid later and I set to on various jobs. Only it didn’t entirely go smoothly. It turns out it’s harder to get a flush pipe for a high level cistern in chrome than I imagined (it’s an order only part, apparently). So that’s ordered. No where had brackets to support the cistern (well, not nice ones), so I’ll have to buy them (off ebay, possibly).
The cistern is partially assembled, but for a reason which escapes me at the moment I had to not fit the float valve – I really can’t recall why, but that’s okay. And then I set to on the soil pipe. The soil pipe was meant to be a few hours work. Connector on, measure, cut, and add length of pipe, and then the right angle; then a few bits of floorboard work, and lo, the toilet would have been fitted.
Instead first up I found that my builders have run the soil pipe so close to the last joist that a connector wouldn’t go on. Cue an hour of attacking the joist (which is not in the most convenient location) to reach the stage when I could actually get the connector in place. Only I couldn’t get it on to the pipe. I’d noticed that the builders spent a lot of time swearing while doing the soil pipe, I’m now aware as to why. It’s fucking impossible.
After a solid hour, lube, washing up liquid and heating the pipe all having been tried I had a break, returning to it and applying, essentially, brute force…lead to it finally going on.
So I cut the next section, raised more floorboards – by now I’ve decided that I’m going to have to ditch the original floorboards and have chipboard flooring – but I’m going to have to put a floor down; this has become apparent because the floorboards are too knackered to leave bare.
Anyhow I go to fit the pipe and…it won’t go on. Brute force, washing up liquid, everything. I do keep managing to open up the clip-together-seal at the end. But it’s not going on, and then the bloody thing went in, but with the clip together seal apart.
Now, I tried to reassemble the clip together seal with it there, but bear in mind that you can’t reach one side of the clip, because… it’s next to the joist. So I start trying to pull apart the connection. Only the wrong side of it is moving. I tried everything to get the side I wanted to come out but no. No. the fucking thing came apart from the side I’d just spent 1.5 hours getting on. Thus undoing all the work I’d done today, pretty much. And, in the process of getting it off the section of soil pipe that I’d cut? I broke the fucking connector.
So now I need a new connector and I get to start all over again.
I have never dealt with soil pipes, I’ve only ever done the clean side of plumbing, and plastic little sink-and-bath waste pipes. In future, I’m happy for it to stay that way.
