13th Oct 2000, 10:00
I have for once decided to pull a page. Not because I don’t feel what I wrote in it, but I feel bad because I put my friends in an unacceptable position. That of having to choose between two people. This I shouldn’t have done and I regret it.
My feelings may still be there, but I don’t feel I have the right to make people choose.
11th Oct 2000, 1503
I’ve been editing this now for 40 minutes. 40 minutes when I should have been making my Java work…The anger which I felt has abated, I’ve relaxed. I’m still emensely pissed off, but my mind has wandered a bit, and I’m feeling a little more normal.
But I said many moons ago – I will not edit these diary entries, I will put up my thoughs such as they are though I may tone them down while editing once saved no change shall be made apart from spelling corrections.
So, below are my thoughts (well, they’re actually on another page)…but bear in mind they although similar to what I’m thinking – are not actually what I feel right now.
11th Oct 2000, 1420 / 1450
Friends of my Ex may not want to read this one, I’m sorry that I gave in and wrote this, but she attacked me again today and I’m fed up of it.
And to my ex: I don’t give a damn what you think now. You’ve pushed me too far – too often for me to care about you. You or your demands for censorship rights to my diary when I comment on what you’ve said or done. Though now maybe I see why you wanted them. Don’t bother contacting me. I’m not interested anymore.