Hmm. I’m beginning to wonder if I’m not suffering from some sort of low level depression. Although I sometimes feel quite cheery, there’s this kind of underlying “I feel shit” thing going on.
I’ve sadly sobered up – and woken up rather, after my minor drinking fest (although 3 drinks is hardly a drinking fest)….And I feel this kind of essentially misery sitting there. Just being there. And nothing I do, or think about seems to shift it.
Even when I’m enjoying myself with friend/s I find that if it goes quiet I can find myself drifting into depression. I’m not quite sure what’s caused this. Perhaps it’s the feeling (as I’ve said before) of being stuck at home. Seeing no possibility of getting out in the near future….The fact that it took almost all my willpower to just get out of bed today.
I don’t know where my energy has gone. I don’t know why I’m so down – maybe the “sir” thing took more out of me than I expected….and I wasn’t wildly cheerful before that (*This is not that I didn’t enjoy the meet, just I had this low level misery before the meet, during it and after it….*).
I’m more or less okay when I’m with people. It’s when I’m alone that I start getting more flakey….and I have no idea what to do about it….
Anyway, I think 4 updates is a little excessive for one day, so I’ll stop now….
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Kate