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oldcoyote:

mum: i don’t know how you do the things you do. if there’s a problem you just teach yourself how to fix it, and fix it. i never had that.

me: after decades of dad telling me that i can’t do things honestly 99% of my insisting on doing shit myself without his help and just working until it’s fixed is pure unadulterated spite

mum: next time he tells you you can’t do something like mow the lawn just look him square in the eye and say, “what do you think i’m going to do, set the mower on fire? only an idiot would do that” and watch his face

me: ???

mum: oh man there’s a photo you gotta see

me: holy shit was that taken in the 80s?

mum: yep

me: is he trying to put out a petrol fire with water?

mum: yep

me: this is magnificent

mum: yep

me: honestly this whole thing is making me so fucking happy but my favorite part is that you literally stopped to go and get the camera and take a picture

mum: i just knew i’d need it one day